NaNoWriMo 2009 Winner

I did it.  I clocked it on November 29 with 50,167 words.  And it felt good but a little anti-climactic.  I'm definitely proud of myself.  I've never had the dedication to slog through 50,000 words in one sitting - or 26 sittings, as the case may be.  But the book is only halfway finished, so if I keep up with my word count, the true celebration will be on December 31, 2009 with a completed first draft.

NaNoWriMo was an amazing experience and one that I'm sure I will repeat year after year now that I've discovered its benefits.  Things that I've learned:

1) I do have the discipline to write at least 1,667 words a day - every day.  As I mentioned in a previous post, I tend to build up steam and take off on projects full speed ahead.  Then on day four or five, I lose momentum and end up abadoning the project.  Not so in this case.  In fact, even when I skipped a day (or two when we had friends in town on the second to last weekend), I still had the willpower to face the keyboard the next day.

2) I can make the time in my day to crank out 1,667 words.  In fact, using Write or Die, I managed to crank out an average of 1,800 words a day in 45 minutes.  I used the online program and set the settings to Normal Mode with a Strict Grace Period.  I did three word sprints each night at 600 word for 15 minutes each.  At the end of each 15 minute sprint I pasted my words into my Word document, saved, took a breath and reset Dr. Wicked for the next sprint.

3) These were not quality words, but they moved the story along.  And in the midst of the ramblings that will surely be cut in the second draft, some gems appeared. Whether it was a secondary storyline or a small scene that really worked.

4) Dialogue is my comfort zone.  If I'm taking all the time in the world to write, I can create some good descriptve passages, but when I'm sprinting through wordcount, dialogue is a natural place for me to settle.  My dialogue scenes help me work out character development.  How a person talks tells me a lot about their personality.  With each of the characters I've created - even the minor ones - I can hear a distinct voice.  The conversations also help me reveal backstory and move a scene along.  When I go back to edit, the dialogue passages will need to be significantly tighter, but for now it's a good tool to move the plot along.

5) The biggest obstacle for me is fear.  Every time I sat down at the keyboard, I had to recognize that I was scared.  Scared that I was wasting time on a pile of dreck, scared that was creating a document that would prove to the world that I'm incapable of writing fiction, scared that I was jumping into a great abyss not knowing where the story was going or how I would find my way out.  I had to acknowledge this fear and type in spite of it. And believe me, that's not an easy thing to do. 

6) But at the end of every night's session, I was energized.  I typed through the fear and somehow emerged at the other end. Things happened in the scenes that I could never have predicted, a character took on a personality that I hadn't imagined.  Standing on the other side of fear is much better than being too scared to give something a try.  I may not always feel talented or creative at the end of a writing session, but at least I feel brave.  And when it comes to greater life lessons, brave means a lot more to me than creative.

7) Although I didn't have very much interaction in the NaNoWriMo forums, something about knowing that other people were slogging along with me was spirit-boosting.  When I sat down last night to crank out my first set of words for SaNoWriMo (Sara's Novel Writing Month - i.e, December), I suddenly felt very alone. Sure there were a lot of writers out there still writing, but the cameraderie was gone.  It took every ounce of my new-found writer's bravery to continue putting words on the page.  But, I did it!

NaNoWriMo came to a triumphant, albeit quiet, close. And SaNoWriMo began with a new found tenacity and bravery that I didn't know I had.

NaNoWriMo :: Day 18

Word Count: 30,684
Morale: Off the charts

What a great writing night.  Everything just flowed. Some nights I worry so much about the structure of it all.  Worried that people are talking too much, worried that flashbacks are cliche, worried that this whole effort is nothing but a playful whim that won't be fit for human eyes at the end of it all.

Tonight, there was no worrying - just amazing writing. I learned lots of new things that I didn't plan for.  For example, Maggie's grandfather died of cirrhosis due to his alcoholism.  He was an alcoholic?  Didn't know that until tonight when I was writing.  And in Maggie's recollection of him from her childhood, I wrote what is possibly my favorite scene so far.  All of the writing advice out there talks about "show, don't tell."  That statement is always drumming in the back of my head while I'm writing (along with Fall Out Boy and Single File drumming in my head while I'm writing, too).  This seen tonight was the epitome of "show, don't tell" and I didn't even have to think about it while I was typing.

Maggie and her sister are now on a quest for a hidden pond on the family farm, and Maggie's had some huge discoveries about these voices that she's been hearing.  I could keep writing all night, but I'm afraid if I go too far tonight, it will be like pulling teeth to get the words out tomorrow. I'd prefer to stop while I'm in the groove and go watch "Glee."

Happy writing to all.  As I said before, the good golf shots are the ones that keep you coming back.  This shot tonight was a hole in one.  I'll definitely be coming back to the NaNo game tomorrow.

NaNoWriMo :: Day 10 (The Day of Dialogue)

Day 10 Wordcount : 17,055

Day 10 Morale: High

I'm still on track to meet my 50,000 word count by the end of the month.  The first week, I built up a word cushion, but was forced to take two days off over the weekend. Friday night we had a friend over for dinner.  I spent all day running around after the kids, cleaning and picking up toys.  And we spent all evening eating an amazing meal and getting caught up with an old friend. Since I've proven to myself - through my repeatedly failed efforts to get up at 5 a.m. - that I am not a morning person, if I don't write at night, I don't write.  

Then Monday night, I got caught up in website design for Kevin's high school reunion.  Let's be honest, had I wanted to write, I could have put aside the html and thrown myself into it, but I didn't.

Here's the great thing!  I'm one of those people who starts things full steam ahead - workout programs, diets, soundtrack contests.  Typically about a week into these things, if I have one stumble - one missed workout, one piece of chocolate cake thrown into the diet mix, etc., the enthusiasm goes right out the window. I was worried after my two days off that this might be the case with NaNoWriMo. But, surprisingly, it wasn't.

I sat down to write last night and I was frustrated.  My characters have been trapped in this incredibly long conversation on the front porch of their house.  There's a lot of pacing and talking, but very little else.  As I've been writing the words, my inner editor and my inner instant gratification junkie have been screaming at them to finish up already. I didn't want to finish the scene, I didn't want to hear them drone on about their past problems, I just wanted them to get on with it.  If I'm honest about it, on Monday I avoided writing because I couldn't figure out how to move them along and get on with the story.

Last night, after a great Mexican dinner, I took charge again.  I wrapped up the scene - albeit, abruptly - and got my characters headed on their merry way.  And this was just the change that I needed. Maggie returned to school and met up with her college roommate.  And I love the roommate.  She's funny and brash and has just the kind of energy that keeps a scene moving.  I whipped off 2,000 words in 45 minutes without even thinking about it.

After thinking about it this morning, I've discovered the difference.  Maggie doesn't have a long backstory with her roommate.  They've only known each other for six weeks, so they are writing the story together as they go.  They have adventures, they make discoveries without thinking about it. When she's with her family, there is all of this history and layers and loves gained and loves lost, blah, blah, blah.  I need to figure out how to wade through that (and deliver the right amount of information to the reader) without it becoming a wordy mess.

I'm wondering if maybe the roommate is going to play a greater role in all of this than I originally thought.  She and Maggie are fun together, and I like writing them.

NaNoWriMo :: Scene Soundtrack Contest (Part 2)

Tonight's scene is at a completely different locale.  We've gotten Maggie out of small town, USA and she's returning to college in the big city.  Her roommate convinces her to go out to a club.  I'll admit, it's been years since my years of hanging at at "Motor" in Detroit.

I need updated songs for inspiration.  I'm been hanging out a lot in the emo world as far as my recent musical tastes, so I'm at a loss for a good, bass pounding club song to inspire the writing of this scene.

Any suggestions? You can still enter the Part 1 of this week's contest here.

Rules are the same.  Submit a band or song that could inspire a Pandora radio station.  You can leave a comment on the blog, send me a tweet at @samill1 or send me a message on the NaNo forums (I'm Colorado Columnist). I'll compile the entries.  All entries must be in by midnight on Saturday.  I'll announce this week's winner on Monday, and send you a compilation CD inspired by the song that you suggested next week.

NaNoWriMo :: Day 5 Characterization

Day 5 Wordcount:  1,802 (total word count is at 11,479 - I broke 10K - woo, hoo)

Day 5 Morale:  Excited - plowed through two different scenes in an hour and finally got Maggie out of the small town hospital!

Day 5 Song of the Day:  Shooting Up in Vain from the "Go" Soundtrack

I introduced the antagonist tonight.  Once this chunk 'o words goes through a major first revision, I'm guessing that the antagonist will enter stage left a lot earlier.  But for now, he's arrived.  I still don't have my finger on this guy.  My other characters - Maggie, her friends, the ex-boyfriend, her sister, even the upcoming love interest (can't wait for him to enter the picture - he's so interesting!!) - I feel like I already know.  But this antagonist, I'm not so sure about yet.  I think it's because when I lay awake during October planning this book, Mr. Antagonist was Mr. Minor Character.  The story was more of a Man vs. Nature, Man vs. Himself type-thing.  And then I realized - that was boring me. 

The next day, while creating some timelines, I realized that Mr. Minor Character was the perfect antagonist.  He was in the right place at the right time, and he has strong motive for foiling Maggie's plans. No, he's not a superhero villain (don't know why the word "foiling" just came out of my fingers - must be all this NaNoWriMo stream-of-consciousness), but he's the perfect antagonist. 

However, there are still some cloudy areas in his backstory.  I think I'll spend a little time this weekend in Mr. Antagonist's world to find out what makes him tick.  Tune in to the next post for Part 2 of the soundtrack contest.

NaNoWriMo :: The Muse is a Frazzled Hausfrau

Day 4 Wordcount: 1,877 which brings my total to 9,677

Day 4 Song of the Day:  I spent a lot of the afternoon listening to the Pandora stations created via yesterday's soundtrack contest.  Many thanks to punkgrrlshim, Phoenix_Maat and Aikanaro (via blogger); shannonwritesright and procrastella (via NaNo forums); and @kazoochica and @niassa (via Twitter) for the great suggestions.

The funny thing, is that after all that listening, I didn't listen to any music while I was writing last night.  And that was a bad idea. Lesson #864 learned from NaNoWriMo, I'm a much better fiction writer when my headphones are in and the iPod is cranked up. I can lose myself in a scene much more easily when I'm not hearing the neighbors drive by, the dog barking at a fox outside or Alex kicking the rail on his bed in the next room.

Please be assured that I'll be actively listening to all of your suggestions from now on, because writing without music seems to leave my creative well a bit parched.

Which brings me to the point of today's post.  The creative well and how it works with fiction.

By profession, I'm a non-fiction writer. I write reviews of the performing and visual arts, I write scientific articles, I write brochure and website copy.  And you know what, I'm a very creative and sensuous non-fiction writer.  No, not "sensual" - there's not too much hot and bothered about Obsessive Compulsive Disorder in Doberman Pinschers.  Sensuous: taking delight in beauty; of, relating to, or derived from the senses. I've always been that way. 

I experience the world very deeply with my five senses.  I see subtlety in colors that others can't quite detect.  I notice the textures that others don't take the time to experience.  My brother can tell you a great story about how I rubbed Sara Lee pound cake on my cheeks when I was young because I loved that cool, smooth top that it has. And don't even get me started on the crisp edge of a freshly washed pillow case or the gag reflex induced by things that dollop.  And most importantly, as a writer, I've always been able to concoct a great phrase to capture the quirkiness or subtleties of these sensuous experiences that bring our world, and consequently, our writing alive.

But, my muse is a bit frazzled and can't seem to get out of her bathrobe with NaNoWriMo and the unsurety of fiction writing facing her.  There are times that I feel like I'm trying to dig a hole in the sand.  I'm chipping away at layer after layer (plot, character, dialogue, imagery, tone, etc.)  Every time I make some headway, the sand slides right back down the sides.

For now, my brain is focused on plot and what happens next.  This is new to me, because in non-fiction, it is what it is.  The dog is born, the dog has a faulty heart valve, the scientists find a causative gene, the end! But, there's no roadmap in fiction. It's up to me to decide what happens next, and I'm having an incredibly fun adventure discovering these things.

However, the things that are happening aren't pretty or moving or subtly grating so as to make your skin crawl - they're just happening.  For example, last night the ceiling was "yellow and cracked" in Maggie's hospital room.  How cliche is that? Some great stuff happened in that hospital room, and some pivotal conversations took place. But they took place in a "yellow, cracked room" with a "creaky bed" that smelled like "Comet and old ladies perfume."  Pretty sad, huh?  Description for me, right now, is nothing more than a cliche adjective dump. Imagery, and the quiet nudges that make our world so much more intriguing, escape me when I'm writing this first draft.

This has been a hard pill to swallow - but also a huge lesson learned.  You sometimes have to sacrifice quality to let the story tell itself.  Then you can go back and wrap it in the transparent, papery layers that let out the savoriness one peel at a time.

NaNoWriMo :: Scene Soundtrack Contest

I'm stuck...not with the book.  But with the music that I listen to while I write.  This is isn't entirely true, we own so much music, it's a little ridiculous actually.  I'm not stuck, just uninspired by the music that I have at my fingertips.

So, we're starting a new daily contest at Lunacy.  Find me a song to inspire a Pandora radio station.  I will give you a run down of the scene that I'm writing, you reply in the comments with any song ideas you might have that fit.  The lyrics don't have to fit, but if they do, that's great too.  Don't spend a ton of time analyzing the challenge.  Sometimes the best musical inspiration is just a feeling that you have.

Kevin and I play this game quite a bit.  He often wakes up with certain songs stuck in his head or will start whistling a tune for an unknown reason.  It usually takes a few minutes to figure out what inspired the synapses of his incredibly deep brain to shoot that song into his conscious mind.  But, it's always fun to figure out why.

So, back to our task.  Day 4: Writing a scene in a small town hospital, characters include a drunk, jilted teenage boy; a shifty shrink and a protagonist who think she might be going crazy.

Send your thoughts my way in the comments section. You can also send me a tweet is it's easier.  You can find me here http://www.twitter.com/samill1  I'll let you know if your song inspires a great new station.  Gotta love Pandora!

P.S. I'll choose a winner every Saturday during NaNoWriMo.  The person whose song inspired the best Pandora station for me will get a "mix-tape" CD sent to them - created and paid for by me! A great way to discover some new music. An even better way to get back to our glory days of the "mix tape." If you're too young to know about "mix tapes" they were the classic courting method or break-up healing technique used back in my high school dating days.

NaNoWriMo :: Day 3 (Another a-ha moment!)

Day 2 Wordcount: 4,190 (That puts my total at 7,800)

Day 2 Theme Song: Appreciation and the Bomb by The Spill Canvas

Nothing fancy about the song lyrics tonight.  In fact, when I googled the lyrics, they seemed like a veiled attempt at a cliche song about suicide.  Tonight's scene definitely had nothing to do with that. The tune just happened to pop up on the Genius playlist that my iPhone created at the exact moment that I was writing the face-to-face break up between Maggie (MC) and Marcus (already her ex-boyfriend, but he wouldn't take no for an answer over the phone. He forces her to do it in person while they are at the festival.)  The song had the perfect sad strains of guitar that fit with the scene.

Morale is good today.  I had a huge jump in word count because I rewrote the Prologue (hate to call it a "prologue" because I know those are fairly taboo in publishing right now. But that's pretty much what it is.), and I got the opening scene betwee Maggie and her grandmother nailed down.

The final scene of tonight was tough.  I'd been looking forward to writing it.  It's the climax to Chapter 1 and tied together a lot of the elements that have been put into play over the last 5,500 words. It was really hard to write, though.  Even though I've been running it over and over in my head for a week, I couldn't seem to get just the right words and intensity for what I needed.  I mentally highlighted this section as one that will need to be COMPLETELY reworked in the next draft.

But, once again, I made some big discoveries.  In the midst of my excitement, I had also been terrified to write the final scene because I couldn't figure out exactly how to make it work so that it would tie in to some discoveries that Maggie will make in subsequent chapters.  But, once again, it just came to me while I was writing.  I breathed a sigh of relief, shook my head in amazement at this muse of mine who likes to hide until the very last minute that I need her and dove back into writing so as not to lose the creative flow.

More to come tomorrow. I'm excited to start the next section.  I'll be getting them out of the festival and on to the next locale.

NaNoWriMo :: Day 2 (Why Do I Think This is Crap?)

Day 2 Wordcount: 1,829 (That puts my total at 3,610)

Day 2 Theme Song: September Skyline by Single File
"Let's drive tonight and race the autumn skyline. And should I fall tonight, we'll know just what it takes to feel alive..."


The book opens with MC and her friends driving through the cornfields of her podunk farm town.  It's October, and they're heading to the town's Pumpkin Festival.  And the pivotal scene that I wrote tonight involves a fall - both literal and figurative.  Go figure.  I'm definitely reading way too much into this because I don't actually listen to any of the lyrics while I'm writing, but something must be seeping in because the comparative literature major in me is finding all sorts of meaningful, albeit slightly contrived, connections with these songs.
 
Day 2 Morale:  Comme ci, comme ca...  I'm having no trouble whipping off the words.  Took me just over an hour to get those 1,800 down on the page, but I feel scattered.  There is a ton of backstory with these characters that needs to be explained, but I feel like I'm having a verbal diarrhea dump - trying to get it all out RIGHT NOW.  I don't think I've mastered the skill of weaving in bits and pieces of the backstory.

HOWEVER, and this is a big however, (Thus the capital letters!)

I made some HUGE discoveries today.  Once again I had a plan for where the characters needed to end up in today's work.  Plan was terribly thwarted and I didn't reach the destination, because things just started jumping out of my brain.  In the midst of this steaming pile of verbosity, I created some new connections and some major plot points. 

When I say major, I mean that at one point, my eyes actually teared up and I got shivers realizing that the words I had just written were going to be yet another connection that is vital to this story of lost souls.  Once again, that's what will keep me coming back.  I'm already anticipating a whole bunch dribble is going to get cut in the first edit, but I'm also convinced that I need to work my way through my own wordiness to find these discoveries that are trapped in my subconscious. 

Crazy how this writing thing works! Now I understand why it's so addictive. It's like guilty playtime.  I've never had a hobby that makes me feel guilty for having this much fun.  And now I do.

NaNoWriMo :: Desktop Background Calendar

Many of you know that I signed up for the National Novel Writing Month a few days ago. While reading the forums over at NaNoWriMo headquarters, I discovered a great idea to stay motivated and keep track of word count.  Writers create desktop backgrounds for their computers.  This way, every time they boot up the ole' word processor, they'll be reminded of the goal for the month.  I say "word processor" because I'm discovering that most writers (most people, for that matter) have the same problems that I do.  Having the internet enabled while writing leads to lots of "research" and very little writing.  Case in point, my hour spent over at NaNoWriMo reading instead of getting the work finished that needs to be completed in order for me to take on this monstrous writing task.  At least I know I'm not alone.

Here's a link to the desktop calendar that I designed.  It is set to 1280x800 to accommodate my laptop dimensions.  It has just enough room to the left of the calendar that I can still have three rows of icons that don't block the calendar.

Feel free to download for your use if you like it. Click on the image below to open it larger in a new window.  Then right click on the image and select "Save as Background".

By the way, I'm not sure what's up with the pink.  I've never been a pink kind of gal, but recently it seems that I've been tapping into my inner (and heavily-buried) girly-girl.  New blog design - pink.  Desktop calendar - pink.  Next thing you know, I'll be buying pink to wear, and I've agreed to write a novel in a month.  What is happening to the world?